Click here if you don't mind a brain overload of Hypness :)

Exams are over but no idea how the last two went... There was a crazy one comparing THREE set works. Oh thought I, I don't know that much, lets combine knowledge about three pieces and get more marks! Ahem. Fail. Also confusion between harmony and tonality, very strange.

Don't quite know what to do now. Have a distinct lack of... anything.

Tonight at Brownies they did a sponsored see-how-many-clothes-you-can-wear-at-once. It was... surreal.

I had a dream last night.
All of us (i.e. the crew) were on some trip somewhere, but I can only remember speaking to Opher. Suddenly I had a mad panic and left the room, running blindly to the nearest bathroom. Oh no! I thought. I'VE FORGOTTEN MY DEODERANT!!!! You know how you get like little bottles of shampoo in hotels? Well to my great relief, in the cupboard in this bathroom there were some mini deoderant bottles, of my usual deoderant. Relieved, I left the bathroom, only to hear the sound of beautiful piano music... I discovered a strange old attic staircase to my right (This place was weirdly like the Royal Agricultural College btw) and followed it up.
In this room was a piano. Except it wasn't a piano, it was just a box with keys, but in my dream it was a piano and it was gorgeous. I walked up to it, just wanting to play a few notes, only for a strange man to come running up, yelling and saying I wasn't allowed to play it. Why not? I asked. He pointed at the front of the piano, where in pernament marker someone had written Lizst. Apparently this was Lizsts own piano! Mere mortals such as me weren't allowed to touch. It had some kind of symbol on it too...

That's all I can remember. I just liked the deoderant.

OCYO hoodie. Huzzah.

<3 you?

One of the most exiciting things this month! Rachel phoned me! From Peru! Like, on the phone! From PERU! It was most exciting :)

I am pleased that a happy ZZ is returned.

History coursework. Hmmmm. Does Jo discuss the extent that WWI had on the transition between the modern and romantic periods, focussing especially on the rise of expressionism, nationalism and the impact the war had on them? Or does she discuss Prokofiev and Shostakovich and the extent that living in opressive countries detracted from their creative output?

Or does she just not worry about this until the music exams are over...

I like the idea of the last one.

They have moved the common room. ALthough there are new seats, it is small. It is also over the DARK DESTROYERS room. Mrs Bennison thinks this will create amusion. Ahem.

Not posted with the last post due to sensitive contents.

Please PLEASE pray, I can't emphasise this enough. Thank you!

As many of you will now already know (>>>:/) there is going to be a changeover here. This acccount will be used to manage communities (lj user="soulsurvivor247">) and be more philisophical. lj user="hypwnage"> will be used for personal stuff instead. If you are on my friends page now, I will refriend you on my new account.

See you on the other side!

Well. I was just going to talk about the failure that was this evening, but as I have been asked today "Who is Lloyd George?" I should probably explain that first.

David Lloyd George was Chancellor of the Exchequer from about 1905 to 1915. Here he became Chancellor for munitions, and then Prime Minister 1917+ (I think). He was incredibly sweet and lovely and cool, until he became the first person to sell cash for honours… but he is a legend. And a prominent person of our history course. And that’s why I posted about him.

Well. And now for the disaster.

So, new bands first gig tonight. Quite looking forward to it, thinking it’d be a laugh.

It wasn’t.

We got up to Abingdon by 6 as requested (yay) and carried our stuff in. Band practise till about 7, which was good… at 7 we got asked to go for a sound check. Yay said we. Off we went.
By 7:20 we were still waiting.
By 7:30 (doors open) we were told we would have to play a bit later, about 7:40 instead of 7:35.
By 7:35 (meant to start playing) we were told they hadn’t got any kettle leads (basically power leads) and therefore that someone would drive to Didcot and pick a load up.
By 7:40 the prospects of an unplugged (literally, not plugging in our instruments) set were discussed.
By 7:50 we were asked if we could possibly play without a bass. As we had a bass solo, we said no.
By 7:55 we decided to cut a song so that we could not overrun 15 minutes.
At 8 we got on stage!
By 8:05 we were playing
By 8:05:30 we were not playing
By 8:06 we were playing again
By 8:06:30 we were not playing again

Repeat the last 4 lines about 9 times over two songs and you have our set.

We dropped the first song ¾ of the way through, didn’t finish it. Where is my mind only got interrupted once and Ride got straight through.

Joseph kept telling me from the crowd I was flat.

Who knows what happened. But it was… bad… I felt so bad for the young enterprise team, could just see Jon and Georgie wanting to scream by the end, but Lizzie kept her chin up bless her :)

And the band may have split up…

If you hold your hand out of the window of a moving car at night, the air hits it like a thousand tiny needles, pinning flesh to bone until you can’t feel and you are numb and can finally breathe.

I like writing songs. As far as I’m concerned, a good song is one that allows you to perfectly capture how you feel at that moment about something, someone or an issue. Not something superficial but something you care about from the bottom of your guts. Something you can really feel. A lot of stuff I write captures it. Because of that, I am a good songwriter in so far as my songs let me express me and remember how I felt about things.
It is hard to sing songs written by someone else because can you really feel them and there emotion? It’s tricky. If you bring your own meaning to a song I suppose it’s possible. But to do that you need to grow with a song. Over time it finds its own meaning to you.

…I don’t know where this is going…
I guess I’m trying to reach the conclusion that I might want to write songs for a career. I want to express myself and help other people find their meanings in what I write. You know things like, 10 songs that help me when I feel blue? When I feel happy? When I feel lonely? I want to be able to connect with people and make them feel.

Trouble is, I can’t sing. To do this I will have to give my feelings and emotions to someone else to sing about. It’s like handing someone a piece of your heart on a platter and saying here, eat it until I become the fire running in your veins and even though I’ll run in your veins you’ll still have your actions and body, so you can use me and my emotions to fuel yourself.

…Thoughts in my head always sound better than when I say them or try to write them down.

Screw this. I don’t always want people to understand what I mean. Sometimes you have to admit that they won’t, and just keep things in your head. Some things are better left in there.

Lloyd George

1) Do they not think he might have changed the slightest bit? Ok, they're saying cash for honours would make him slaughtered today. Maybe, but surely if he was born into this political climate he'd be able to adjust his ideas like cash for honours?

2) THERE IS A MISTAKE ON THE BBC WEBSITE. It wasn't a Liberal-Conservative coalition, it was a Liberal-Conservative-Labour coalition :D

3) ... I thought he would look like a shaggy haired welshman with a big beard and a daffodil. But he's not :(

4) Ms Card said that apparently there was a release today about a plot against him... the Suffragettes planned to kill him with a poison bullet! But I couldn't find it anywhere on teletext, and the BBC site... wikipedia may provide more. No. Did I imagine it?...

More on Lloyd George tomorrow. Or perhaps a beginners guide to womens war work... yes, that may help me revise.

More on a lot of stuff tomorrow. Especially band. One of them situations...

And yay for 11 months today. Huzzah for Adam.

Well I feel I should write something here on this expanse of webnets I like to call home.

Any Dream Will Do. Anyone else been watching? A guy from VI (who apparently has now dropped out) is in the final 12. Good for him. Andrew Lloyd Weber is a little creepy and has a huge grand piano in every room. I wish I had a piano in every room. I wish I had one grand piano. It'd be cool. But our little one is good. It plays well enough anyway.

Talking of pianos, grade 7... think it was passable-standard. Some stupid things, but aren't there always. Now it is time to play with Debussy. We like Debussy. A couple of bars of soundtrack off FFVII sound like they just ripped off the girl with the flaxen hair. It is bad. A girl in my music class is playing that on the saxaphone. I like her and she's a good player, but... that on the sax... no... :(

FFVII. This is a good game. The realtime battle system initially seems a little confusing, but as I've just played it at Adams haven't really examined it yet so we will see.

Adam. He is home. It is good. We spend time together. There are dilemmas. But it is good.

There was an interesting show called The Bible Revolution on earlier. The church has done some stupid things in its time. Anyone else catch it?

Band. New band is ok I guess. It's weird working with people who are from totally different music cultures. And also a little impossible. But, we'll see. Maybe.

I always really want to write something on here... something interesting, something compelling, thoughtful yet amusing. Meh. Maybe one day.

FInished history coursework. Huzzah.

S'pose that is all for today. Farewell. Tomorrow you may get a long ramble about thoughts. But tonight its jumbled. By tomorrow they may be a little more coherent. Maybe.

Moses led the Hebrew slaves to the Red Sea where they made unleavened bread, which is bread made without any ingredients. Moses went up on Mount Cyanide to get the ten commandos. He died before he ever reached Canada but the commandos made it.



Socrates was a famous old Greek teacher who went around giving people advice. They killed him. He later died from an overdose of wedlock, which is apparently poisonous. After his death, his career suffered a dramatic decline.


Sir Francis Drake circumcised the world with a 100 foot clipper, which was very dangerous to all his men.


The greatest writer of the Renaissance was William Shakespeare. He was born in the year 1564, supposedly on his birthday. He never made much money and is famous only because of his plays. He wrote tragedies, comedies, and hysterectomies, all in Islamic pentameter.


Writing at the same time as Shakespeare was Miguel Cervantes. He Wrote Donkey Hote. The next great author was John Milton. Milton wrote Paradise Lost. Since then no one ever found it.

Johann Bach wrote a great many musical compositions and had a large number of children. In between he practiced on an old spinster which he kept up in his attic. Bach died from 1750 to the present. Bach was the most famous composer in the world and so was Handel. Handel was half German, half Italian, and half English. He was very large.


Beethoven wrote music even though he was deaf. He was so deaf that he wrote loud music and became the father of rock and roll. He took long walks in the forest even when everyone was calling for him. Beethoven expired in 1827 and later died for this.


Karl Marx was one of the Marx Brothers. The other three were in the movies. Karl made speeches and started revolutions. Someone in the family had to have a job, I guess.


Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.

"Don't hurry, don't worry. You're only here for a short visit. So be sure to stop and smell the flowers." (Walter C Hagen, 1892-1969, American world champion golfer, from the New York Times, 22 May 1977.)


"I have walked that long road to freedom. I have tried not to falter; I have made missteps along the way. But I have discovered the secret that after climbing a great hill, one only finds that there are more hills to climb. I have taken a moment here to rest, to steal a view of the glorious vista that surrounds me, to look back on the distance I have come. But I can rest only for a moment, for with freedom come responsibilities, and I dare not linger, for my long walk is not yet ended." (Nelson Rolihlahla Mandela, born 1918, South African lawyer, statesman and 1993 Nobel Peace Prizewinner. This quote is from Mandela's inspirational 1994 book, Long Walk to Freedom.)

*rubs feeling back into fingers*

Well today was… an experience…

We went to the higher education conference at Reading University. Mm… For me, the whole point in going was purely to get some careers advice on music. So, after an entertaining bus ride there coupled with a vague recollection of thinking when my alarm went off at 7:30 “you’re annoying shut up” and therefore getting ready and walking there early in 40 minutes we arrived. Lecture one- music tech and production. Although I hate these things on principal, they probably are good areas to be qualified in because there’s such a big market. And so I thought, let’s have a look.

The lecture was in the plant science building (little shop of horrors anyone?...) and so when I eventually found it I spent a jolly 5 minutes wondering round the building and being treated like a science student (…?... could they not see I was visiting?...) after finding the building and wondering round, I eventually found the hall I was supposed to be in. A polite notice told me the lecture was cancelled. An impolite connexions advisor wasn’t very helpful. And so I wondered round a little more.

The next lecture of pure music I was *really* looking forward to. And, guess what… cancelled :/ so the day had little point. Went to teacher training instead. Remind me never to teach.



EVER.

History was interesting. I liked the woman, she’s like Tottie from the History Boys.

And then we had a rather chaotic lunch, in which there was much hill rolling, people stole Carls shoes/coat/virginity, Zoggy threw things, and much fun was generally had.

Then the best part. Ramble, Opher and I grabbed each other by the handles (of each others bags) and plunged into the university stands. I got through around 6 carrier bags (stupid plastic handles) as well as a carrier bag. Saw Elliott and Jess as well which was nice.

And then, my favourite part of the day… coming home, getting mum to help me carry huge bags of prospectuses back to the house and then pegging it over to Adams and relaxing properly for the first time in 3 months.
Missing doesn’t seem quite the right word to describe when he’s not round…

http://www.swartzer.com/writing/serenity2000.php

I have recieved a complaint about my last update in that it makes women seem unhappy with their situation, we should learn to put up with that, it makes us stronger etc.

This is true.

However, when one is lying in agony this doesn't stand up for much.
Also, most of that conversation was joking :)

So please don't take it the wrong way, it was just a joke. As painful as periods are, VIVA LA REVOLUCION!

xxx

Yay is- 10 months today! Huzzah! I love you Adam :)

Boo is-

Jo | Hypothesis says:
I'm not feeling well, so not really looking

Dic | It's not heaven without you there with me says:
whatr's up?

Jo | Hypothesis says:
women pain...

Jo | Hypothesis says:
I think my ovaries may explode...

Dic | It's not heaven without you there with me says:
tis so psycalogical

Jo | Hypothesis says:
...are you joking?

Dic | It's not heaven without you there with me says:
nope

Dic | It's not heaven without you there with me says:
mine barely hurt

Jo | Hypothesis says:
you've never had a period

Dic | It's not heaven without you there with me says:

Jo | Hypothesis says:
0_o

Dic | It's not heaven without you there with me says:
we shoudl swap places, then I could show you some real pain!

Jo | Hypothesis says:
...are you still joking?

Dic | It's not heaven without you there with me says:
nope

Jo | Hypothesis says:
you get kicked in the balls say 3 times a year

Jo | Hypothesis says:
WE GET THIS EVERY MONTH

Jo | Hypothesis says:
and TELL MY WAVERING BODY ITS PSYCHOLOGICAL

Dic | It's not heaven without you there with me says:
well, tis

Jo | Hypothesis says:
its really not

Jo | Hypothesis says:
you have no idea

Dic | It's not heaven without you there with me says:
I am pretty sure I do

Jo | Hypothesis says:
no you don't

Dic | It's not heaven without you there with me says:
whatever you chose to believe, is not mine to manipulate I guess...

Jo | Hypothesis says:
?
Dic | It's not heaven without you there with me says:
hehe I know all too well. Ah, the joys

---

Dic. You have actually got no idea about what it is to be a woman.

:p

I am going to do a Sez today and have a MASSIVE rant. However these are subjects I actually really care about, and therefore this is serious.


Rant subject 1. CUTHBERT.
As you may or not know, Cuthbert replaced Bert (sob!) as head of music at the end of school last year. There is much anger at her ability to waste time and her inability to teach already. This evening, I was preparing an essay for her on Brahms’ use of major and minor tonality. As I leafed through some teaching notes she handed out 3 months ago, I realised that they were very good (yay) but that she obviously hadn’t read them herself due to the inconsistencies between what she’s been teaching and what they say. I am going to trust the notes, but unfortunately they only analyse the first 20 bars in great depth. This means that the rest of the piece must be analysed to great depth so we see what else she hasn’t told us. This is very time consuming and results in ANGER.


Rant subject 2. The council.
From my room, I can see a field full of horses. Horses are cute. If I leave my house and wonder round the corner, I can go for a walk in miles of countryside or relax in a field. I can stroll through a wood planted for the millennium. I can sit for hours and gaze at some cows which we believe are trying to take over the world, or at least battle cows in a neighbouring faction for territory. I can do any number of things, all of which I thoroughly enjoy.
But how long will this last for? Not long.
The council plan to build a road from Park Road through to Hagbourne, demolishing 52 houses and one of the most scenic pieces of land left in the county in the process. Nice one South Oxfordshire Council. Really, no, great call. You won’t destroy hundreds of habitats. You won’t ruin the locality. You won’t destroy people’s social lives. You won’t ruin transportation in the area. You’re NOT IDIOTS.
THE ANGER IS OVERWHELMING. WHY?!?! It’s stupid enough in the first place that they intend to build houses upon prime agricultural land, let alone RUIN this area…. GAH. ANGER.
I have a lot of memories in that field and area… learning to ride a bike, going sledging, playing cricket and football, walking a family friends dog, having first kiss (^_^), going for long walks, blackberry picking… the list goes on.
I can’t believe they plan to destroy it.


Rant subject 3. Teachers.
If someone gives in their form and money for a trip, a trip that it is not actually just a nice idea for them to go on but a trip that they actually NEED to go on having no ideas about what to do with the rest of their life (especially after the school cancels the category you really need at their stupid careers seminar evening) it is actually quite nice for you to respond to them in the way you respond to other pupils. Give letters to their tutors for example, and put booklets in their pigeon holes. Every one else who has given their money in for that trip has got something back from the school, but me? Nooooo. And where were the teachers at lunch time, when pupils are the most likely to need to speak to them about things like this trip? No where to be seen. Great.


Rant subject 4. Parents.
I am not likely to get in to Oxford University. The people there are too clever, and there is too much competition. However if I tell my mother that I intend to try for it, just to see if I can because the music course looks amazing, it is not good for my confidence that my parents, the ones who are supposed to encourage me, look incredulous and suggest that it isn’t a good idea to go for it. Of course it’s probable I won’t get in, but I want to try, because if I work hard I think I may get an offer. So thank you mum for doubting me, because that just makes me feel so GOOD INSIDE. Maybe I shouldn’t bother making the effort to go to university anywhere if I’m so STUPID.
And now they're acting like I'm unreasonable because I'm upset my parents have no faith in me. GREAT.


*is actually quite upset*


Feel a little better for letting that all out though. Try not to rant too much, but it all comes out in a big blob in the end… Probably just the result of too many hormones and too much stressful work (thank *you* miss Cuthbert. No, really.)


Backs feeling better though. Have brought a pain gun, it works miracles. I’m not right yet, but it’s getting there.

Apologies for the last update. My crazy friends seemed to have hijacked the computer I left logged on.

A lesson learnt there.

(the last word of music is door)

Hello. I am Jo. I am gay. I love slash.

Delirious? sucks.

The internet is a series of tubes.

I love havig dialup. lol!!!

I love the Spice Girls.

I love recorders group. Ms Baugh is the best teacher. So is Ms Griffin. She rocks.

Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed Certainly Indeed

I’m trying to remember a poem I wrote in year 6. It was about the moon, at least in part. I can’t remember the simile I used then, but it summed up the moon a few evenings ago. The good thing about forgetting things is that you can think up new expressions to sum up what you want to say.
This evening I think the moon looks like a ball of solid white marble dropped onto the skies velvet cushion, dusky blue. Isn’t dusk a wonderful word? (to quote Anne of Green Gables). Dusky. Dusky dusky dusky. It just… it’s one of those words that couldn’t possibly mean anything else.

Time is flying, as Opher observed the other day. Feels like just yesterday so many things happened, and yet here we are and are we growing up or what?! I always used to wonder when you could consider yourself “educated”; when one became knowledgeable (she says, using spell check on that word!) to be a scholar. I wonder how it started. Did someone just slip in a comment about politics one day, another about a favourite book another and some interesting thing about history? Did it spread from there, this collective knowledge we now have about politics and literature and music and history and technology? Or was it when we started to consider the thing beyond big big school, which was incredible enough at the tender age of 4, university?

We just seem to be so much more than we were even last week. We can laugh at "cultured" jokes, we have expertise, we can even talk sporadically and brokenly in French! I for one feel more grown up in myself too. But when and why? It’s just one of those things I suppose, we just grow up without thinking.

I miss Adam. A relationship means to be there for each other. Nothing wrong with being the other end of a phone or computer, but… real life is good too :) Soon, very soon…

Well careers seminar really succeeded in pointing out two jobs I do not want to do with my life.
Journalism. Had been a kind of thought, like, oh I suppose maybe…
No. WAI.
You have to be totally insensitive for a start, like going and banging on peoples doors a few hours after a family member or friend has died and ask personal questions. Just… No.
Also, you have to work stupid hours. As soon as there’s a story, you get up and go.
I don’t really care that much about what I earn, but there’s a lot of commitment involved for poor money.
Plus, it just didn’t sound good.

So, games programming. Have to learn C apparently, which should be possible. All very interesting, enjoyed the seminar. Am considering maybe finding a MOD community to write background music for. Apparently most jobs in music within the games industry include one composer a game (often the likes of DANNY ELFMAN, drat it) and people armed with melons and cricket bats who record sound effects. They recommended just going in to teaching or studio recording if I really want to do music.
Maybe if I work hard, composition or programming will be an option.
As it stands, I’m down at least one job option and for the other one soooo much work is involved.
Not necessarily a criticism, but its not something I really have a passion about.

Now, a lot has been said recently about God, especially in Khlos blog. I think its time that instead of discussing why God doesn’t exist someone should say why they think he does. This morning I went to a sermon which discussed why God is a serving God, and that’s what I intend to talk about here. All this is based on a sermon by a guy called Sam Storms.
This is my God.

( The God who serves )

I’m trying to remember a poem I wrote in year 6. It was about the moon, at least in part. I can’t remember the simile I used then, but it summed up the moon a few evenings ago. The good thing about forgetting things is that you can think up new expressions to sum up what you want to say.
This evening I think the moon looks like a ball of solid white marble dropped onto the skies velvet cushion, dusky blue. Isn’t dusk a wonderful word? (to quote Anne of Green Gables). Dusky. Dusky dusky dusky. It just… it’s one of those words that couldn’t possibly mean anything else.

Time is flying, as Opher observed the other day. Feels like just yesterday so many things happened, and yet here we are and are we growing up or what?! I always used to wonder when you could consider yourself “educated”; when one became knowledgeable (she says, using spell check on that word!) to be a scholar. I wonder how it started. Did someone just slip in a comment about politics one day, another about a favourite book another and some interesting thing about history? Did it spread from there, this collective knowledge we now have about politics and literature and music and history and technology? Or was it when we started to consider the thing beyond big big school, which was incredible enough at the tender age of 4, university?

We just seem to be so much more than we were even last week. We can laugh at "cultured" jokes, we have expertise, we can even talk sporadically and brokenly in French! I for one feel more grown up in myself too. But when and why? It’s just one of those things I suppose, we just grow up without thinking.

I miss Adam. A relationship means to be there for each other. Nothing wrong with being the other end of a phone or computer, but… real life is good too :) Soon, very soon…

Well careers seminar really succeeded in pointing out two jobs I do not want to do with my life.
Journalism. Had been a kind of thought, like, oh I suppose maybe…
No. WAI.
You have to be totally insensitive for a start, like going and banging on peoples doors a few hours after a family member or friend has died and ask personal questions. Just… No.
Also, you have to work stupid hours. As soon as there’s a story, you get up and go.
I don’t really care that much about what I earn, but there’s a lot of commitment involved for poor money.
Plus, it just didn’t sound good.

So, games programming. Have to learn C apparently, which should be possible. All very interesting, enjoyed the seminar. Am considering maybe finding a MOD community to write background music for. Apparently most jobs in music within the games industry include one composer a game (often the likes of DANNY ELFMAN, drat it) and people armed with melons and cricket bats who record sound effects. They recommended just going in to teaching or studio recording if I really want to do music.
Maybe if I work hard, composition or programming will be an option.
As it stands, I’m down at least one job option and for the other one soooo much work is involved.
Not necessarily a criticism, but its not something I really have a passion about.

Now, a lot has been said recently about God, especially in Khlos blog. I think its time that instead of discussing why God doesn’t exist someone should say why they think he does. This morning I went to a sermon which discussed why God is a serving God, and that’s what I intend to talk about here. All this is based on a sermon by a guy called Sam Storms.
This is my God.

( The God who serves )

Just thought I’d share some things that struck me today whilst meditating on Revelation 12 (a tricky book if ever there was one!)

The thing that really got me were these verses:

“And there was war in heaven. Michael and his angels fought against the dragon, and the dragon and his angels fought back. But he was not strong enough, and they lost their place in heaven… Then I heard a loud voice in heaven say:

‘Now have come the salvation and the power and the kingdom of our God,
And the authority of his Christ.
For the accuser of our brothers,
Who accuses them before our God day and night.
Has been hurled down.”

(Revelation 12:7-8, 10)

Now contrast this to Romans 8:34-35;

“Who is he that condemns? Christ Jesus, who died- more than that, who was raised to life- is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ?”

What a contrast!

I know that in my heart of hearts I have a fear. I am scared of getting too close to God because he sees my sin. Even more so, I am scared of letting him fill me with his Spirit to the point where other Christians may be able to have a word of knowledge about my sins. Of course this is paranoid and wrong, so why think it? I didn’t know. And now I know for sure just how stupid this is.
If there is no one there to accuse us, and Jesus is in fact there interceding for us before the throne, then why get worried about this sort of thing? Of course there’s no problems with a little bit of spirit; a few healings, a bit of “slain in the Spirit” style stuff.
That mentality ends here for me.

I am not proud of my sin. I am scared of people seeing it. But will I let my love for God compromise it any more?

No.

This has been good to meditate on. If you have some free time, study Revelation. I especially recommend the Life builders guide (I think!) very good stuff.

God bless

xxx

...done.

My English coursework was 5000+ words when first written.

Now it is a mere 2,325.

I shall miss the Merchant of Venice ;_;

I feel sleepy....

Today Adam and I have officially been in love for 9 months.

Yay!

End.

What a fantabadoozie day :)

Francis Kitching… I won £150. This is not enough for a viola but is a) enough to get my bow re-haired and b) will go a goodly way towards purchasing a new bow. Yay!

Today much sleep was had, until 11:30. This may be because sleep was not there until 1:00 this morning. Anne of Green Gables really is a good book.

Jeans shopping was done. These jeans are falling apart. Two pairs were purchased. A top was also looked at, but the zip fell apart in my hand when I tried it on which kind of 0_o’d that plan. But all well.

And Smiths! This morning I discovered I had £10 worth of Smiths vouchers. Books were all weird, so the item of purchase was Stadium Arcadium for a mere £8.99. That’s two Chilli Peppers albums with 14 tracks each, essentially only £4.50 per CD for two great CDs! And then they gave me a £5 off book voucher for any book over £10. Exciting! But book purchasing shall be done in Oxford due to much greater range. And also to buy Classical and Romantic Performing Practise from Blackwells. That looks like a rather fine book.

My Grandmothers love life ^_^ She has a “friend” in Canada who’s always rather liked her, but she rejected him. He sent her flowers for Christmas which she was unhappy about. Today he phoned up and asked mum to buy £10 of flowers for Valentines day for her! She’s going to go crazy and it shall be rather amusing.

In Didcot there is a strange phenomenon. It is that, come the winter months, people seem to think that building work is a very sensible idea, including parking HGVs across pavements forcing people into mud, creating much mud, generally ruining pavements and being unkind. What a great idea to build things in February. Aren’t people clever. Because with all the snow and rain and so on, its not like the mud and general muck will be spread even further or anything horrible like that is it…
In all fairness, town has been developed so much recently that it’s probably just because people are making new houses for everyone who now wants to come and work here.
Its still rather irritating.

Anyone for a film on Saturday? Music and Lyrics and Epic Movie have caught my eye recently… any takers/wanting to watch something else?